Addiction to Unhappiness?

Question by Crofton S: Addiction to unhappiness?
I am an only child, raised by two full-time working parents. I was emotionally neglected and only learned from my parents examples. They both had what most people call jobs, not careers. Needless to say, my parents were never “happy.” Now don’t get me wrong, my parents didn’t have many problems (never argued, no drug or alcohol problems, infidelity was never an issue, etc, etc). They just lived their life. Never looked forward to anything but their days off, and even then just relaxed. Nobody ever showed me how to be happy. As a preteen, I developed emotional issues (depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, etc) and by 16, I dropped out of school and wound up in a short term pysch ward for attempting suicide. After my hospitalization, I hurt myself to deal with life. Well, I moved out and things improved. I met the love of my life, started college, and started finding myself. Soon after, I became depressed again and didn’t know why.
Since, I’ve simply been fighting with myself, trying to reason with an unreasonable self. I get depressed so easily and about the silliest things. I’m starting to realize my moods are simply so unstable that I quickly fall to a low mood, maybe because it’s easier to maintain. Silly question, but how can I let myself be happy? How can I find things I enjoy? How can I save my good mood when I feel it slippin’?
I am 21 and married. I have been on meds before, but messed with me pretty badly. I’m very leery of them now.

Best answer:

Answer by Lauren B
have you tried medication? how old are you? need more details…

Answer by kittykatB4
OK trust me please, im not crazy, but i could give u a long explaination but it would not be as good as the one you will get if you go out and buy the book called “A new earth” by echkart tolle. Trust me if you take this serisouly it will change your life, it made me a much happer person!!

Its only like 8 dollars too, please do it
Dont go on medication please!

There is a way to find happiness in yourself, im not trying to sell something here. this book changed my life!!!!| Please email me if you end up with the book i would want to hear if it worked for you..

4 Responses to “Addiction to Unhappiness?”

  • talloolah:

    Get some meds… see a therapist, but make sure you can relate to them… work on your every day problems and issues.
    And, every day, the first time you see the sun, close your eyes, let it warm your skin while you do afirmation for all the wonderful things that you currently have.
    Remember there are people all over the world that have to worry about how to get their next drink of water, a little food, and a safe place to sleep. You are one of the lucky ones, really.
    Be joyful.

  • cavassi:

    Try getting a workbook on depression by David Burns, MD. Happiness does not just happen, as you have found out. People have to work at it. I think the journey to better health begins by taking a deep look at yourself. Accept who you are right now, depression and all. From where you are, you can start going anywhere you want. I’m not saying you’ll get there, but realize wherever you are, that is where you are meant to be for a reason. If you would like things to be different, that’s fine. Everyone I know would like things to be different in some way. Define how you would like them to be different. Try it. If it didn’t work, assess why it did not work and try again. Don’t think anything was a failure; it was an opportunity to learn more and to determine the next step. Do not predetermine where you are supposed to be, but work for short-term goals and eventually you will find what your long-term goal is supposed to be. It is alright to have a long-term goal in mind, but realize it may change as you learn more along the way. Try to do as much good for others as you can along the way and you won’t go wrong.

  • michael_white2:


    A person’s body releases hormones according to the demands on their body. When you work your body hard, it’ll release a hormone that’s described as being a ‘runner’s high’.

    Not to mention being in good health improves ones psychological well-being. If you’re not in good health, your body will make you feel worse – so…get on a treadmill.

    Best regards – Michael

  • docjp:

    Personally I have found that “happiness” is difficult to obtain and almost impossible to sustain. However, if you can be content with “Peace”, this is possible to experience all the time.

    We, that is ones MIND takes on, much of the programing that is within the MINDs of our parents. This has value to us only in so far as it “conditions” us to react to certain events that occur to us in Life. The Karma coming to us is met by our programing, and we tend to react like out parents reacted to events in their lives… and if we do not react in this way [even thought we may not do so because we are ourselves more consciously aware or more highly evolved] our MINDs have an “expectation” that we “should” act in a certain way… and it “beats us up” by feeding us words that cause us to hurt ourselves.

    The only way to disengage from this “programming” is to eliminate it. And since it is non-conscious to us, how do we do this, right? By grieving for ourselves when we feel badly, and attempting at the same time to “remember” when we felt this way as a child… and to tell our MINDs that this experience is no longer “needed”. The more one is able to embrace sadness, and take it deeper into grief, the more one automatically erases the old programming. Grief is the key… go into it deeply and as often as you can.

    As for the happiness thing… please realize that nothing, and I mean nothing on the physical plane is permanent. So go ahead an laugh and be joyful as you can be and just expect that this is temporary… so “expect” an end to it.

    But as you learn to accept the high and low as simply natural swings one must go through, you will develop a sense of Peace.. and this you can carry with you into every situation and event… always trying to remember that none of this experiencing outside yourself is as REAL as the Peace within yourself. So focus on the Peace and just watch what is going on outside yourself.

    This is detachment, and what mystics encourage us to embrace as a more healthy reality.